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In my preoccupation with proving myself to my male peers, I was totally oblivious to the fact that I was behaving like an unbridled sexual predator. I felt entitled to exploitee bodies and believed that women existed for my personal sexual gratification.
The entire setting at Spring Break tacitly supported, celebrated, and promoted this type of toxic masculine performance. The notion of masculinity I adopted from my culture taught me to.
I do not blame the culture for my actions, I take full wwomans for. Heavily influenced by pop-culture and pornography, my sexuality had been hijacked.Lonely Girls In Oxnard
During my coming of age years I learned to devalue sex, objectify women, and assert dominance over women. My view of sex was so diminished that it became transactional; it was something to take from women as a way of validating my control over.
I was a man possessing women and making it look cool, or so I thought. Although it features me in an extremely negative light, I am humbled to share that my life has since changed dramatically.
I am deeply regretful and apologetic, especially to all the women I have used. The destructive path I was on came to a screeching halt exploite a sequence of sports injuries.
Laid up and physically unable to stay on the party train, Boody was finally alone with. I came to the painful realization that the way I was living was merely an attempt to hide my own emotional deprivation and deep feelings of insecurity. In reality, I was desperately lonely and yearning for approval and connection.
All the promiscuity and dissipation had extinguished my humanity and left me devoid of all dignity.